Step One: "We admitted we were powerless over alcohol-that our lives had become unmanageable."
Hello my name is Adrienne and I am an alcoholic.
There. I just completed the first step.
Ok I will expand :)
So my advice is to get through the steps as quickly as possible. Well, of course it is important to do them thoroughly and to the best of your ability. The reason I say this is because I used to think I had to get each step down perfectly before moving to the next. I thought I needed to completely thoroughly absolutely understand every thing there is to know about said step. Thank God this is an ever changing program and more is always revealed. Truth be told, I was right around my three year mark when I feel like I completely comprehended the first step. (It's funny cause I say this now but give me three more years and my understanding will totally change again, be more in depth and more fine tuned.)
Step one tells me I am an alcoholic. As an alcoholic, I am bodily and mentally different from my fellows. FACT. Actually, on page 30 of the Big Book it states, "We learned that we had to fully concede to our innermost selves that we are alcoholics. This is the first step in recovery. The delusion that we are like other people, or presently may be, has to be smashed."
THE DELUSION THAT WE ARE LIKE OTHER PEOPLE HAS TO BE SMASHED.
That says it right there. We are different. We are alcoholics. For me, being an alcoholic means I cannot drink. I can't. Simple as that. Sometimes that makes me sad, or mad, and I don't think it's fair. Oh well. Get over it. Wait- let me rephrase that. I can drink. I can physically put the bottle to my lips and swallow. However, what happens next is what separates me from a non-alcoholic. I won't go into details, but it's really not that pretty. Any alcoholic who is reading this knows exactly what I am talking about. The obsession kicks in, the phenomenon of craving takes over, and suddenly getting, consuming and having more alcohol becomes the most important thing to me at that moment. More important than my job, more important than my friends, even more important than those two sweet angels I gave birth to. All bets are off and I am off and running. That's what I mean when I say I am powerless over alcohol. That's what I mean when I say I am an alcoholic.
The first step is a foundation imperative to working the rest of the steps. I had to gain a full knowledge of my disease to truly understand what I am up against. This is a nasty disease. It's a disease of the mind. Some see us as weak, unable to control our drinking. Well they are right. I cannot control my drinking. But it doesn't mean I'm weak, it means I am sick. But thank God there is a solution. I found it in the rooms of Alcoholics Anonymous. If you are reading this and nodding your head in complete understanding of what I am talking about, then welcome. Perhaps I will see you in a meeting. I'll save you a seat. Better yet, I'll warm one up for you.
I do it because it works.
I do it because I live a life of recovery.