We’ve talked about it before, the ups and downs of Life. They seem so much more dramatic than I ever remember when I was drunk off my ass. Huh – who woulda thought?
It's discouraging, to say the least.
It’s frustrating at times, knowing that what I am facing is often such a tiny and trivial issue, a moment that is a mere blip in the grand scheme of things... but when I’m in that very moment, when I’m letting that moment surge through me, whether happy, sad, fearful, joyful, or just downright confused, it feels…
I get frustrated at times that this feeling is even occurring, even if it is a “good” one, because for every UP, there’s a down. At least when I’m down, I know the UP is coming, it’s only a matter of time.
In as many variations as there is Life on the earth, we’ve all heard this before:
“Everything you are going though is training you for what you asked for.”
I didn’t know I was asking to be trained when I simply asked to be helpful; when I asked to have my character defects removed; when I asked to have my assets be useful; when I simply asked to be serene and at peace.
But apparently, I did. It’s kind of a part of the way it works. I need to know how to use the tools to help me become serene and at peace, and me being the guy I am – I work best hands on. I think in Life, we all do. Kinda sucks I can’t just download it from Google or suck it in through Wikipedia… humph.
It’s so important. I do it daily, sometimes for minutes throughout the day, sometimes for a much longer stretch at once, but I have to do it. And I don’t mean I “am forced to” or “it is so necessary that if I don’t, I will die.” I mean, “That’s a mountain I want to climb so badly, that I just have to do it.” So I do. It’s part of my training, as difficult as it is.
I have to remind myself, usually on a continual, daily basis, that I’m being trained for something greater. Something that is going to make a big difference to SOMEONE. And that someone could possibly be… me.
Whatever you do – just don’t give up. It will pass. Tomorrow will come. And the following day, too. Find a person in whatever program you use that is helping you the most – and grab a hold. They want to help you. They just need to know you need it. We all do. Recovering, or not.