Letting others see in, so we can see out.

We are Recovering alcoholics and addicts, and these are mini-chapters of our lives. Here, we are learning to live a life of choice; we're learning to live Drunkless.

We'll share in our writings, in our podcasts, in our photos, art, and music -- our creativity will show who we are, what we're going through, and how we make it -- 24 hours at a time.




Barely Gratitude

By: DL

Sometimes, I just need to remember.

With my counselor, as well as my anonymous group, we talked about both my marriage, as well as what our turning point was.

There's a lot of crap I'm remembering that I don't know that I want to. Some of it is "good" to remember, like in the group when we talked about our turning point. But my counselor really helped me dig up some old stuff I didn't want to remember... strangely, it relates so much to some of the things I'm going through now. I see now how they're tied-in in many ways -- but I would have rather forgotten some of it.

I came home and began writing my story again. I've written it so many times, its sickening, but each time I write it, it's like something different is recalled. It changes. I mean, the story is there, it is still the same -- but things I'd forgotten about show up! Some seemingly insignificant, others -- how did I forget THAT?!

I don't like it!

I didn't sign up for this! I didn't ask for any of this! Why is this so damn difficult sometimes?! And worse, it is the loneliness that goes along with it! Who do I talk to about this? I only see my counselor one hour per week! Don't get me wrong, she's wonderful, and a tremendous help -- I just need more sometimes. Sometimes, I think i'm just peachy -- other times ... <sigh> not so much.

I almost finished the basic rough draft of my life story (again, for the bizzilionth time), and then I noticed how late it was. This is my blog for this evening. I'm sorry if it isn't hopeful, positive, and up to par... I'm just frustrated. And this is a blog, a real-life blog. This is where I am at right at this moment... and I don't like it.


Gratitude - Day 31 (Tuesday)

I guess, really, NOW is when the gratitude list is most important, when I'm feeling ungrateful, hopeless, lonely, lost, and depressed.
forgive my lack of enthusiasm:
1) I have a home.
2) I have a job.
3) I have a running vehicle.
4) I have a great counselor.
5) I have an even better friend.
6) I have other friends.
7) I have a loving family.
8) I am relatively healthy.
9) I'm not dead.
10) I still WANT to live.
11) I still have feelings -- even if I don't like them at times.
12) I'm learning -- all of the time.
13) I have a small, lingering bit of hope that this will all end well.



Drunkless Life

Be Positive. Be Compassionate. Be Love. Be Spiritual. Be Life. Just BE.

Drunkless does not intended to diagnose, treat, or resolve any alcoholic or addiction condition in any way, shape or form.  Drunkless deals primarily with chemical addictions and aims to share the experience, strength, and hope of our bloggers, podcasters, and associated guests and visitors.  Though we recognize and realize that there are many forms of addiction and mental disorders, we are not experienced nor educated in ways where we can advise or give feedback on many of them.  As such, it is up to our visitors to discern the differences and to take appropriate action to seek help for themselves or loved ones.  However, we do hope to provide a glimpse into the correlation between some of them and hopefully allow someone a "one-up" on getting help before it becomes life threatening -- after all, that is our goal -- to provide hope where we can, and possibly save a life.

The authors, podcasters, artists, creativists, and other "hosts" on this site do it therapeutically, educationally, inspirationally, and to share their experience, strength and hope, as well as for entertainment... After all, we are not a glum lot.

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