Attracting, Asking, and Faith
Well, new scene tonight! I’m at a different coffee shop! Much gentler music, too, and not so loud. I think I may have found a new spot to work.
I am here instead of there because ZJ suggested this spot when she found out I was meeting a new partner-blogger for this site. I’ve heard of this spot before, and I think I was even at another location in a different town (about thirty minutes away), but I’ve never been to this one.
And yes, you read that right. I’ve got another blogger coming on board. She’s going to blog when she can, so it may be days in a row, or a week out, but I’m really excited to have her with us as I think she’s going to really add to the content of the site. She’s been a good friend and an important person in my sobriety, and I am very much looking forward to reading what she’s got to blog about. So keep an eye out for Drinkless Sakyong and what she’s got to say (see her first post!).
This is a pretty good ending (so far) to a very tired day for me. I didn’t get any sleep last night, or it felt that way, because I couldn’t get my mind to stop racing. Interestingly, it wasn’t Left Side and Right Side that was keeping me up, it was just the day’s events. I had a lot going on, and I’ve made some choices that I’m not so sure about yet (and no, it’s not drinking stuff). Time will tell, meanwhile, I’m nervous about all of it, and I can’t quite release it.
But I need to, or this “not drinking stuff” could potentially become “drinking stuff.” Oi.
I’ve done a lot of meditating and praying on this “issue,” but I’m not settled just yet; I don’t know what it is going to take to, except for time.
Time means patience, and although I wouldn’t mind having more patience, I just wish the Universe would hurry up and give it to me! But then, maybe I’ll retract that request, because when I ask Mother God to give me something, it is always preceded with lessons and training.
Hence the pickle I’m finding myself in these last few weeks (months?). I believe in the power of The Law of Attraction, the “Ask, and ye shall receive” and “All it takes is faith the size of the mustard seed” statements; but what we’re never told is that, even though they will be revealed the way God wants, we’re going to have to work for it and learn how to handle and use it before we get it. Sometimes, this includes confusion and some painful lessons. I don’t want the confusion, nor the painful lessons.
To choose, or to not choose… [finish it how you will].
But it's too late for me, I’ve already chosen. Now we’ll see how the Universe directs this play I’ve opted to participate in. Maybe She’ll be gentle on a tired, lonely soul like mine – then again, maybe I just need to learn how to act.